North Carolina State Representative(RF-Republican-Female) Rayne Brown has introduced a bill which would make it a Class H Felony to expose the nipple from the female breast in North Carolina . Oy veh! You talk about having too much time on your hands.
My first thought is whether the "right nipple " is Republican and whether the "left nipple " is Democrat in this bill . What percentage of the nipple must actually be shown to constitute "exposure". Will only "C-cups and up" be covered(I mean uncovered) ? Will there be "nipple lineups "? Will all the cases be heard(I meant seen) in "Boob-Court" ? Will witnesses be required make positive nipple identifications ? How will "blind witnesses " be able to attest to the truth (May I coppeth a feeleth of thy royal tomatoes"?) ? How will plea bargains work out ?
How long will a nipple have to be exposed to qualify? On your first "nipple offense " can you go to "night bra school"? Are sunbathers covered ? I guess this is the end of "strip clubs " as we know em .
Before you panic and lose all hope though , we still have North Carolina's leading "boob" -expert to swoop in to save the day... Yes, you guessed it ............................John Edwards.
Hey, I gotta go, it's getting a little nippy out around here.
Reporting Steve " Double C " Goldman
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