If a Republican is Elected President, I'm Moving to Canada .

I gotta tell you , that is one fu__in scary looking Republican field of candidates . I cringe just thinking about them . Well , three are basically out . Homophobic Michelle Bachman quit . She's opening a hair salon with Sara Palin.
"Right Wing Rick Perry " received one vote in all of Iowa from a retired Evangelical corn farmer . Newt Gingrich's ear size continues to grow . He's still living in a friggin time warp . One very weird guy ...Probably secretly enjoys whips and chains .
So that leaves us with Mitt Romney . I could never vote for someone with a first name which is the same as a piece of sports equipment ("baseball Mitt"). Then there is Ron Paul who is a "re-tread", who just won't retire . Did anyone say Tea Party ? I rest my case! Finally, Rick Santorum a former Senator and practicing attorney . Boy oh boy, Rick's legal careeer has been filled with big victories and noble causes, including his representation of the World Wrestling Federation in it's litigation where he argued that they should be exempt from steroid oversight because wrestling was not a sport. Just the kind of "health nut " we want in office . Maybe Barry Bonds will run as his VP.
So where does that leave the field ? South Carolina and New Hampshire are next . (Yawn).No more debates please, I'm begging you ! More torture.
Hey you know what, I got an idea . Let's "black out " all future coverage of the Republican primaries . Yeah, just wake me when it's over this summer and let me know who won . If necessary I can take a crash course in French, in case I actually have to move to Quebec. Oui, oui .

Political analyst Steve Goldman reporting.

Four Republican Candidates on the Stump, Four Republican Candidates, One Falls Down Lands on the Ground...Three Rublican Candidates on the Stump......

Well the inevitable has occurred ! Herman Cain's campaign , which has been rapidly deteriorating for months over past sexual harassment allegations and most recently an affair, is officially over . Cain announced his campaign for Presidency is history . It boggles my mind to think that Cain's people either didn't know about these "issues ", didn't think they would come out or thought that he could over-"come " them, keeping in mind that Presidential candidate's pasts are looked at with high-powered microscopes.
So that leaves three Republican candidates ;Who will implode next ? "Right wing Rick" (Perry) with his refusal to recognize the Constitution's "Separation of Church and State " ,has been sinking slowly and I believe he will be the next to go. "Crazy Newt " will say or do something very soon I'm sure, which will convince any American that he is totally unfit to be President.
So Mitt Romney will get the nod . Unfortunately for the Republicans, unemployment is down, The Dow Jones is back over 12,000, we're pulling out of Iraq and Obama(while not out of the woods yet) has mobilized what I believe to be sufficent support and dollars to sneak in for a second term.
Hey Republicans, if you really become desperate there is always Ms.Palin!

This has been political analyst Steve Goldman reporting.